"DEAR....ANYONE..."

So I have been writing in my journal every once in a while when I feel like I can control my emotions enough to get them onto paper. Except this journal is different. It's for Brock. I write in my "Journal" as much as I can, but instead of saying "Dear Journal", I say "DEAR BROCK". We were talking a few months ago about how I felt during all of my hard times in life. What I was thinking, how I felt, what exactly happened? He told me that he wants to read my journal someday if I would let him, and if I would be okay with it. So I decided to write a journal for him exclusively. He gets to know exactly how I feel about what is going on in my life, even if I can't tell him to his face (which is more often than not).

He doesn't know about it yet, because I haven't figured out when I want to give it to him..I don't have many entries because I had a bad experience the last time I wrote..and it discouraged me from writing more...I am ashamed of how out of control my emotions were...I was mad and I wrote it down, feeling that he should know what is going on in my head when on the outside I have a smile on my face, and a laugh in my gut...

Anyways...I just thought I would write about it and see what ya'll think. Whether I should even give this so-called "Journal" to him or not..

Nee Nee

♥